“Quote This!”

breezer: your hands are so tanned brent
sarahb: Eww they look dirty
dp: its the hair on his knuckles. He has hairy palms too?
*sarab has a confused look on her face*
sarab: you mean like a monkey?

Lisa: I not going to tell you again when my birthday is – we’re supposed to be best friends.
DP: I only know two people’s birthdays, and that’s my mom and Dad - they’re easy to remember because one is the day after the other.
(Pause)
DP: Shit – it’s my dad’s birthday today – I totally forgot. Thanks for the reminder Lise.
Lisa: Ridiculous.

after eating a greek salad, vegetable soup, and a v8 juice
dp: “is it possible to over vegatable, I am concerned”

Sarahb - its like having boobs for the first time. You just want to keep feeling them.

Breezer: its burger season. You can smell it.

Sarahb - “why have I been back here before?”

Mark: Missed the flight and they are out of Steak Wraps and Fanta Orange - this trip sucks!!!

Vince: just walk in the room backwards and you’re ready to leave.

After getting out of our cab in dallas that stunk so bad!
Mark gets out of his cab and says “oh we could have had a stink off”

J: I’ve been raped by the sauce

bt: it would have to be in hd though
dp: of course, we don’t do anything in regular D

Lil wayne’s kid in school: If god didn’t want us to eat animals, why did he make them out of food.

Mark: until the ring is on the finger its all fun times

amanda: Smart! I guess that’s why they pay you the big bucks.
poonster: People are getting paid??

Rachel: My arm hurts. It hurts when I do this. *curls bicep*
amanda: Perhaps you strained it lifting all those cocktails last night?
Rachel: It is my drinking arm!

DP: I am currently walking down Yonge St in said parade. I’m in the remorse section. Right before bliss and just after love. Heart parades. But seriously - in a parade.

Lany: I can’t get out of my hotel because there is a parade blocking the street. How un-awesome is that? Peace, love, non-violence. . . They should promote all of those things by not blocking the fucking road.

Brent: Do you want to go to the Jays game this afternoon?
Jillian: The Jays game? Really? That would be great!
Brent: Really? Cool.
Jillian: No, not even a little bit. I hate baseball more than I hate anything in my life!

BT: Anyone up for food and tons of water at noon?

Kelly: I may actually be dying this morning. I haven’t lifted my head high enough yet to test the theory but just FYI.

BT: I think the problem is that Larry’s had one too many drinks
jBo: I think the problem is that Larry’s had one too many birthdays.

amanda: Which one of you assholes requested Lou Bega?

BT: Perhaps we have a drink before church? God intended it this way.

Kelly: Did you hear that Mike Tyson’s daughter died?
Alicia: Really? Did he bite her head off?

Kathy: I love this band! They’re so good!
amanda: They are good. But you know you’re drunk when you really love the bar band.

Rachel: We don’t hate the Irish. We hate the French.
amanda: True. No one likes the French.
Rachel: We love the Irish! They’re like our drunk cousins!
Mark: Funny. I feel like your drunk cousin.

amanda: Be careful. There’s a lot of crap on there.
Rachel: But I like crap!

amanda: Oh man. I really wanna listen to Snoop Dog right now.
sandra: And that’s how you know.
amanda: Know what?
sandra: You know you’re high when you really wanna listen to Snoop Dog.

amanda: I didn’t get home in time to watch it. Who won Americian Idol?
mom: Kris.
amanda: Figures.
mom: America may be ready for a black president, but not for a cross-dressing American Idol.

amanda: Are you playing BrickBreaker?
Mom: I play it every night before I go to bed. It relaxes me.

BT: Jabes and I are hung like mofos.
amanda: Worth it. I had a great time. I wish Mebs’ neighbours were not such dicks.
BT: Ditto. We were just starting to line up for the RDP part II and they fucked us.

Willy: On a scale of 1 to 10, how ridiculous was I last night?
DP: We call that the booze guilt.
amanda: I’d say pretty much everyone was at least a 7. You were maybe a 9?
Willy: Ohhhhh, I was such an idiot. I hate life right now. On a side note, do you know where either of our sunnies are?

Uhhhhhh. I feel 90.

You know why you can always remember movies lines from the 80’s?
All they are is awkward silences, one liners, and then sex.

amanda: I leave for Oklahoma tomorrow morning.
BT: Oh ya.. how long are you gone for?
amanda: A week
BT: Sweet deal!
BT: Dont get the wine flu!
BT: Or maybe get the wine flu, but not the Swine one.

DP: Some dance on tables, some piss in trees. Unifying theme, no-one likes their feet on the ground.

Mebs while dragging drunk phil back downstairs to the party: don’t worry, this will be easier when I get to the stairs

Willy: if he said “I will keep you a breast” that means he will keep you a boobed in most languages.

Kiz to dp: you smell like cigarettes and red hair

phil: i do my best work when a girl is showered in alcohol and my compliments.

DP: Get your invite in for the wedding
L: Oh Crap – I have the invite – I shall do it tomorrow.
DP: When you hang with arseholes, you get arsehole response times. C’est la vie.
L: That should be in your auto signature

amanda: FUCK. I can’t get any of the data I need because it’s a fucking holiday in Mexico.
m: Really? For Easter?
amanda: Apparently.
m: Who knew the Mexicans were so into Jesus?

DP: There should be TV cameras when we’re out for a night. Better than MTV. What does LC have on us?
amanda: Thousands of dollars and her own clothing line?
DP: Our clothing line would not involve pants – that’s for sure.

meebs: we are going for a liquid lunch.
kiz: did he just say lick my crotch?

bt: how did they bring our drinks so fast?
dp: the must have a blind person behind the bar reading our lips.

fuck my life i hate snow

phil: you know what else is wrong with my hotel room? The toilet isn’t straight. It has a little right to left on it.

DP: Do I look like a fighter pilot?
amanda: You look just like Amelia Earhart.
DP: Isn’t she a woman?
amanda: Yup.
DP: Is she even a fighter pilot?
Lany: Not even a little.

I’m pretty proud that I didn’t listen to you guys when you told me it was okay to take my pants off.

bt: I would have said, “Go fuck yourself.” GFY *long pause* Y. Or maybe without the second Y.